It’s 10pm and the world around me is preparing for a peaceful rest.
A tiny bunch of Baby Fingers clinging on to my night dress sleeps peacefully for he does not know what’s gonna happen tomorrow.
But I know and that’s why my eyelids refuse to close. Am still staring at my precious son, God’s biggest ever tiny miracle in my life.
I can never forget the first time I saw him, fresh from my tummy, He was a heavenly package in every sense.
The day I held him I knew I was gonna live the rest of my life for him, just for him. I knew this tiny gentleman held my world in his fragile heart.
I love him; I am crazy about him.
But for today,
The first day I will be leaving my son back home and go to work. I have a job waiting for me and I am thankful to God for it. But the mother in me sheds a million tears.
I’ll miss the way he gently reaches out to touch my face.
I’ll miss the way he smiles while still trying to eat the baby food.
I’ll miss the way he looks so deeply into my eyes, saying a million ‘I love you’
I’ll miss the way his eyes search for me in a crowd and his expression when he spots me.
I’ll miss his little big hugs, his complete soulful hugs, that fill every empty space in my heart.
I’ll miss our infinite selfies in a day.
I’ll miss his tiny nails gently hurting my face.
I’ll miss his milestones.
I’ll miss his potty times.
In plain heavy words , I’ll miss my baby Ved.
I know he’s gonna search for me cos his mommas touch is unique.
I know he will cry himself to sleep refusing food.
I know his little heart is gonna beat heavily.
I know he’s gonna try out a thousands ways in his baby language to tell Dada how much he need me right now.
I know he’s gonna keep telling himself ” momma will be back soon”
I know he’s not gonna hate me for leaving him behind.
I know he’s gonna be jealous of kids of stay at home moms, for all the precious time they get with their babies.
I just wish I can reverse time and wrap him back into my tummy and carry him everywhere I wish.
Son, I just want your tiny brain to understand that I am taking up a job just for you.
I hope one day you will be proud of mommas decision to work.
I very greedily pray this hour that I might live as long as you live, cos I know both of us can’t pull a day without each other .
Be with me and I will stay strong .
For now take these bear hugs and thousands kisses !!
Your momma !!